Spring stripes
Our balcony contains exactly one piece of furniture — a well-worn bamboo table. This table is wasp nirvana. Every spring the stripy little buggers come from who-knows-where to gnaw on it. You can hear them chewing. Seriously! They land, feast, fly off, and repeat ad nauseum. Obviously they’re using it for nest-building material.
Have I mentioned I’m virtually phobic about bees, wasps, and stinging things in general? This is not a good combination. Normally this means I run inside a lot, but this year I decided to try something new. Lee Valley and Home Hardware sell this thing called a Waspinator. No, it’s not a Transformer, though a wasp-fighting robot would be kinda cool, if needlessly violent. This thing is basically a blow-up nest. The idea is that wasps are territorial*, so if you make it look like your area is already occupied, they’ll stay clear. Excellent, a solution that harms none of us.
Today I was outside planting some seeds. Sure enough, *gnawgnawgnaw*, there was one of my stripy friends on the table beside me, whittling it down as I watched. Aha, I thought, and reached inside for my as-yet-undeployed Waspinator. A few seconds later I returned and deployed The Solution.
The wasp gnawed away. I shuffled closer. The wasp continued gnawing. I shuffled a bit further. The wasp went for a buzzing flight, came at me…and veered off. Then it went back to its original spot and resumed its business, while I stood over it with my fake nest going “ahem…ahem.”
I can’t claim this is a good test of The Solution, but I did find it pretty darned amusing. Next step: find a way to secure el Waspinator someplace semi-permanent outside, and see if that starts having a more general effect.
* This is only supposed to work on ‘social’ wasps, since those are the kind that build nests. ‘Solitary’ wasps need not apply.
The Lustful Vegan 